MESSAGE BOARD: Vol.3 Issue 10 October 2010

HELLO and welcome to the October edition of your Message Board. This month we continue discussing the human spirit at work, with "LISTENING FROM WITHIN" - I hope you find it food for thought...

I thank you for your continued support. If you missed previous Message Boards, you can retrieve them from the Archive.

Read on, and enjoy this issue...



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IN THIS ISSUE

News and Events
The Message Board Feature Article
We Are What We Do
Subscriber Information
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NEWS AND EVENTS

Registrations for our November Snapshot are now open.
As always, small groups work best, so if you would like to bring a friend or a group of friends, I urge you to book as soon as possible. To read more about this event, just click the link below.
NEWS & EVENTS
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Perfect Misfortune: Hope and Healing when Times Get Hard
Allan Flood. 2010 Kindle Edition
If you have enjoyed Allan Flood's refreshing and insightful work in the past, you'll be pleased to know that a revised version of his well known book Perfect Misfortune has been published for Kindle. If you love the new digital book reading technology you'll find this well-priced edition at Amazon.
Here's the link: PERFECT MISFORTUNE
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UNDERSTANDING THE HUMAN EXPERIENCE
Special Invitation to Join Discussion Group
The growth in a deeper understanding of the THREE PRINCIPLES has taken a new step. Understanding the Human Experience is a new global network which has been set up to advance and support conversation and understanding of the human experience via a deeper appreciation of the THREE PRINCPLES.
Membership to this group is free, and by invitation only. To join, it is recommended that you have some understanding of THREE PRINCIPLES of Mind, Consciousness and Thought.
To be invited to join, send an email to Jayme King at:
invitations@understandingthehumanexperience

THE MESSAGE BOARD FEATURE ARTICLE

LISTENING FROM WITHIN: THE HUMAN SPIRIT AT WORK Pt.10

As John (Jill's husband) walks through the family home he calls out "I'm home!" Making his way through the kitchen to the rear of the house he finds Jill sitting quietly on the verandah. She seems to be in a world of her own. John gives her a warm hug and a tender kiss.

"John ..." John intervenes, saying "Let's have a beer." "Love one" replies Jill, as John heads off to fetch them both a refreshing drink.

Sitting in pensive silence for a couple of minutes Jill begins again...

"I wonder if everyone wants to give their best? The thing that puzzles me about people sometimes is that they don't seem to 'get' that they have a choice..."

"you've met Bruce, haven't you?"

John nods as she continues...

"He seems to be stuck in a permanent bad mood. Today, I had to take him aside to talk about his attitude toward his apprentice and he got really annoyed and yelled at me. I gave him some time to settle down and then I asked him if he knew what impact he was having on other workers. He just stood there, silent. It seemed like he was indifferent to the question!"

"In the past I've taken him aside to see what might be troubling him about his work (or his personal life for that matter), but he just doesn't engage. He says he's fine and leaves no room for discussion."

They sit in silent companionship for a few minutes, taking it all in. Jill begins again...

"Today, I told him that his work was good and the potential for Andrew and the other apprentices to learn from him was limitless. I pointed out though that he was rarely relaxed, and that this was significantly impacting his work relationships - so much so that I was finding it very difficult to place people willing to work with him."

Jill hesitates for a moment but John tells her to go on...

"I explained to him that, only the day before, Andrew had asked if he could be placed with another tradesman, because he found it too difficult to work with him."

"Are there any redeemable features?" asks John.

After a short pause and sip of beer Jill responds,

"I did explain that he wasn't just in an occasional grumpy mood. I told him it seemed that his negative attitudes were permanent and that I hadn't noticed anyone befriending him."

"But to be fair, it isn't always that way. So I tried again. I told him that at our last group breakfast I'd seen a side of him I hadn't noticed before. He had a sense of humour and when he relaxed, people liked to engage with him."

"The trouble is, this all vanishes in a second and he becomes cynical and negative again."

Jill stops to ponder the vagaries of human nature and John joins her in quiet reflection. After a while she speaks again...

"My guess is that everyone has tried to relate with him, and some go the extra mile, but it is getting more difficult for people while he maintains his negative stance on life."

"If I remember right, your boss Allen is his nephew. Have you approached him about Bruce?" enquires John.

Reflecting on this, Jill replies.

"Allen told me that Bruce has always been very hard to connect with, even as an uncle. It seems he's had little to do with him over the years."

Jill continues, relating the rest of the unhappy conversation...

"Finally, I told Bruce to have the rest of the afternoon off so that he could relax a bit and consider what I'd said; and that we would meet up first thing tomorrow morning. I made sure to tell him that his skills are not in question - that it was more how he treats people; and that I couldn't ignore the fact that a positive attitude was a necessary part of his employment."

John puts his arm around Jill and they sit together in silence for a long time.

"You know," John says eventually, "it really puzzles to me too that people don't see they have a choice about how they are in the world. They don't seem to connect the dots that their feelings are all about what goes on in their heads. They are making a choice but it seems to me like the choice is made from innocent ignorance."

"Innocent ignorance? What do you mean?" says Jill, curious. John explains...

"Well, you can be damn sure that Bruce is thinking too much about a lot of crappy things and he doesn't know he's doing it. He's lost in a sort of mental world that he doesn't know he creates. He is innocent and at the same time ignorant."

Jill thoughtfully ponders his words and concedes that they make sense.

After a restful evening and good night's sleep Jill arrives at work. She is early and sets to finalising a few jobs before walking across the yard to meet Bruce. She can see he wants to ignore her but she asks him to join her in the drafting office.

"Come in Bruce. Take a seat." she says "What did you make of our talk yesterday?"

"Not much really, I am what I am." replies Bruce, truculently.

"Bruce, let's be honest," she starts, "I'm sure it was no surprise to you that people find it difficult to work with you; largely because of your negative stance on life. But as a senior tradesman I need you to engage positively with people - especially Andrew, since he is particularly influenced by you."

"I want you to stay, and at the same time your relationships need to change so that you can get the best out of Andrew and build more positive working relationships with others. And I think the first step towards that would be to acknowledge that your attitudes are just a thought - an idea you've created in your head."

At this, the silence is palpable. Bruce looks stunned, as Jill doggedly continues...

"If you can allow yourself to see that; you'll see that your feelings are an indicator as to how helpful those thought are to you and your relationships. And the next step would be your intention, your personal commitment, to relax. To make a choice to relax and calm down, even when it's hard to do so. The ball is in your court Bruce. What do you want for yourself?"

Jill sits quietly; hoping vainly that a tiny light will flicker inside him and he will See the moment of opportunity for himself...

Living Spirit: a Question of Performance and Spiritual Development

I am sure we can all relate to moments of 'innocent ignorance'. Possibly, some of us know someone like Bruce. Could Jill have spoken and acted differently so that Bruce would see the possibility of change? That his relationships (and 'how he is in the world') were all about inner intelligence? Perhaps. But importantly, through Jill's interaction with Bruce, we see that:

  • She was able to quieten sufficiently and create within herself an inner space for greater perspective. She chose to explore a workplace event in the quietness of her own mind and the peacefulness of her verandah.
  • Her focus was on both performance and inner development. Moreover, she was able to see that without inner change (spiritual development), outer performance would not alter - or if it did it would be only temporary.
  • Her ability to listen deeply to John while at the same time her own commonsense, was an aid to taking small steps to awaken Bruce.
  • Bruce's performance feedback stated clearly that his present attitudes influenced work outcomes. She invited him to consider inner development and the potential positive outcomes to his work relationships.

Let's not underestimate the circumstance that Jill faced. She was a manager showing leadership within the context of a business who employed family members. She was a relatively new manager who was charged with crucial feedback on senior staff about their attitudinal performance. That required an appreciation of her own self-authority. She was able to draw the line in relation to developing a business culture. She demonstrated maturity in the simplicity of being guided by her own commonsense and goodwill.

A dynamic spiritual understanding of ourselves - the simple power to face complex circumstances and to bring to such events fresh, insightful and innovative responses. That is the hallmark of true leadership.

See you next month as the reflections continue...

Comments on this article? I'd love to hear from you
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WE ARE WHAT WE DO

What do you really value? The answer to this question is obvious when we are in crisis.

Crisis is a moment in time when we need to make a choice that matters to us. And we have the choice, even in crisis, to calm down and be open to a powerful inner resource - our State of Mind, our awareness or consciousness of the value of our everyday lives. But to engage our self- awareness we must have intention, an inner commitment to listen, beyond the distractions and competing thoughts ("I just don't have the time...", "Oh God! What do I do now?", or "Will you just do as you are told!"). We commit to being open to the stillness within.

A crisis does not need to be big, such as the loss of a child or a family member. Crises can be ordinary moments in time - perhaps something as ordinary as a choice to speed to an appointment or not - or a time where you make 'that phone call' or not; or depart from your habitual response and find a fresh new one.

What we value is developed over the million little moments where we respond with YES. Our innate and natural inner resources have value in our daily lives, if we daily commit to listening and being aware of this moment and no other.

Until next time... David

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